Lolita Blog Carnival: Three Secrets for a New Lolita

This week’s topic is…

Three Secrets for Someone Getting Into Lolita.

Blog break!  I think this is a great topic, because even though most Lolitas would give the exact same advice, when you are looking to start wearing Lolita, hearing the same thing from a bunch of different people really helps boost confidence.  So here are the top three secrets to launch you towards being a cute, frilly Lolita!

Secret One) Read up before you dress up.
You have heard it a million times before, but you need to hear it one more: RESEARCH!  Lolita is a complicated fashion and it is the hubris of many new Lolitas to jump into it before really understanding it.  Of course, the most truly enthusiastic Lolitas will know not only the “rules”, current trends and a complete history, and it’s not a bad idea.  If you can get your hands on a couple Gothic & Lolita Bibles, this will be of great help!  They aren’t called “Bibles” for nothing.  The more you know, the father you’ll go!  There is some weird stuff you may see from time to time that isn’t exactly Lolita-kosher and you want to be able to pick those things out, instead of seeing one Lolita with massive legwarmers and thinking that is a “Lolita thing”.  If you do your research, you’ll know whether or not massive anime legwarmers are actually acceptable.

Secret Two) You need to learn the rules before you can break them.
Yes, it’s true.  The rules are more like guidelines, but that does not make them obsolete!  Basic “rules” would include: modesty (not bare shoulders, cleavage, too much leg, bloomers), silhouette (petticoat) and style (sweet, classic, gothic, etc.).  One a hot summer day, no one is going to judge you for forgoing a blouse or bloomers.  Or you choose a more low-key A-line petti instead of a super cupcake one.  Or you even try something new, like Math Lolita.  Whatever, you get the picture.  And all these things are totally cool to do.  Everyone does it and everyone understands.  But, don’t go too far.  If you can get down a few basic, complete, perfect coordinates, you will have a much stronger start and not come off looking like an ita.  Then, this basic understanding of what Lolita is, you can start tweeking it.

Secret Three) Fitting in isn’t just about your fashion.
Going to your first meet-up can be scary.  (I’ll admit, meeting a new community is intimidating!)  But there is one thing that stands out the most to me about being a newbie and meeting newbies: don’t be a special snowflake.  I was highly aware of this the first time I met the North Carolitas because I wore handmade, and I didn’t want to be perceived as having a special snowflake attitude because “I made this!”  As I have said before, I love brand and I love sewing, so it gives me different ways to build my wardrobe.  I love it when new Lolitas come to a meet-up and they are clearly excited, not only to be wearing Lolita in public but also to be meeting others with the same fashion interest.  The biggest turn-off isn’t a Lolita who has no brand or no petticoat, but the Lolita who prides herself on having no brand or no petticoat.

Humility is the secret.

Ask for help from local Lolitas or on EGL!  Don’t be afraid of constructive criticism on Daily Lolita!  Never assume you understand Lolita, there is always some hidden gem from 2005 that you can learn about the fashion’s history.  Lolita is a fashion first, but an attitude to learn is more attractive than the latest print.

And another little secret surprise!  Here is me at my first meet-up!

Here are blogs with more thoughts on this topic: sun in our hands | the cute lifestyle | her lumpiness | lolita glamour | Smithsonian | lace a la mode | r gorey | oh, valenteena | pretty little habits | the bloody tea party


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